Thursday, October 30, 2008

Just So You Know...


Never, ever buy a cleaning product called "EasyOff: BAM"

It claims to do quite a number on greasy, baked-on foods.

Word to the wise: The only thing that EasyOff BAM does easily is sear your flesh off of your bones. My stove is still gross, and half of my hand was rinsed down the drain. On the bright side, it did smell like a Citrus Breeze. 

Thursday, October 23, 2008

The Heartland

I think that, by this point, it should be fairly clear where my sympathies and endorsements lie in terms of the US presidential election. Nonetheless, I saw something the other day that I feel justifies a more explicit declaration.

So, I was wasting much time on YouTube the other night (as I'm prone to do. It's a problem), and I stumbled across a video of a recent Sarah Palin rally in Ohio...or Idaho...one of those flat states that probably smell like manure in the spring. In any event, the clip was of a guy with a mic asking people, in very basic terms, "Why do you support Sarah Palin?" and "Why do you support McCain and Palin above Obama?" I recognize that these are angled questions, that they were looking to draw certain responses out of those interviewed. Regardless of this biased questioning, though, the responses proved to be much more sinister than I'd ever imagined. What I heard were things like "If Obama wins, the blacks will take over. I'm afraid he and his wife could be hiding a hatred of white folks," "Sarah will bring the righteousness of God to the White House," "Obama treats white people like scum, like trash." Be aware that I omitted much more hurtful descriptions.  

And this is middle America? This is what Palin has called "Real" America? I'm not sure why I'm so surprised. It's not like I'm unfamiliar with the racist, bigot, ultra-Conservative country bumpkin stereotype. In fact, one of them has been running the US for the past eight years (oops?). But I think finally hearing it, finally seeing it in its most pure and unadulterated form crystallized for me, the vicious hate and polarization that saturates the American experience. More than Sarah Palin's ignorance of foreign policy, more than her stunning inability to put together a coherent sentence, more than her generalized idiocy, her pursuit of this vote is what makes me so vehemently opposed to her and McCain. Instead of fighting hate, instead of refusing to involve racist and religious fanaticism in the public and civic discourse, they actively seek its promotion. These hate-filled, ignorant clods are actually DESIRABLE VOTERS! Palin and McCain pander to, appease and stroke the egos of these people in hopes of winning their support.

Something is fundamentally fucking wrong with this picture. Racism, fanaticism and hatred have no place in local communities, let alone federal government. I may just be nuts, but isn't the US currently trapped in a quagmire war in Iraq, trying to get rid of precisely this type of governance (up for debate, I know)? How is a fanatically Muslim theocrat who campaigns on the ostracism and killing of "infidels" any different from a fanatically Christian theocrat who campaigns by pandering to racism, hate and violence? Easy answer: They're not. 

If this demographic is, as Palin said, "Real" America, or "Pro" American, then I say screw the "Real"American vote. Regardless of how strong, deeply entrenched or insoluble these feelings of hatred are, they are not real, they are not valid, and reinforcing them through institutionalizing them in government does nothing but spread the myth that irrational, violent, polarized hate is acceptable in any form. 

So I close by saying:

"Here I am, BARACK ME LIKE A HURRICANE" 

Sunday, October 19, 2008

GET IT!

More proof that Canada is awesome: 


So, Jill Barber's new album, Chances just came out and if you check out one album I tell you to on this entire blog, please for the love of all things good and holy make it this one. It's a short 9-song affair, but probably the most instantly lovable album I've heard in at least a year. It's a "throwback album" in some sense- drawing most of its influence and aesthetics from the 1950s love song. HOWEVER, let it be known that this is not a superficial stylistic choice on Barber's part. This isn't her answer to Christina Aguilera's Back to Basics. If you're familiar with Barber's work, you'll listen to this album and instantly know that she's finally come into her strongest niche. She's been chipping away over the course of her last three releases to get to a place where her spirit, her voice and her songwriting meet up in perfect sync. And this is it, and it fits like a glove. Beautiful, charming, simple songs. They're damn near perfect. 

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Just Sayin...

I write many papers, take many notes, and have many conversations on my computer. Despite an absolute over saturation of word processing, the fact that Microsoft Word and Mac Messenger still underline the Canadian spellings of behaviour and colour has not become any less irritating. 

If I specify my language preference as English (Canada), then I don't like being told I'm wrong all the time. 

Fix that shit, Microsoft and Mac. 

Monday, October 13, 2008

Open Letter

To those who will listen,

Tomorrow could mark a turning point in Canadian history. Tomorrow we will vote to determine who will lead our country through one of the most tumultuous and uncertain periods since the Great Depression. We will are balancing on the brink of economic disaster, local, regional and global social tensions have exploded, our cities are crumbling and our agriculture is failing. We are living on the edge. Of what, we’re not so certain. But we’re on the edge of something significant.

When you vote tomorrow (and you should vote. Apathy is no longer an option), consider the values that you hold close. Don’t fall prey to polarizing politics, don’t buy into strategic voting campaigns, don’t be bullied into voting one way or another, and don’t be afraid to develop your own political persona. We all have specific values and morals and ethical frameworks that differentiate us from those around us, even if only in very subtle ways. Vote according to these principles. If you believe the financial crisis will be best solved by an open market, vote for the party that promotes an open market. If you believe that regulation is the way to go, vote for a party that promotes regulation.

We are constantly told to be informed, and to make educated/informed/logical/strategic decisions. So to inform ourselves, we run to the media, parents, teachers, authority figures of any variety in the hopes that we make the “informed” (read, correct) decision. What we fatally regret to consider, though, are our own feelings, ethics and persuasions. If your research has “informed” you that particular party promotes an open market, and you have been informed that this is good, but something inside you says otherwise, don’t ignore that tension. You know your own beliefs and wishes for society better than any person, newscast or website. Trust that voice of dissent within you. The nation only exists because we allow it to. Canada is nothing but an abstraction made valid through a shared mythology. This mythology is rooted in the individual spirits, hopes and beliefs of Canadian citizens. It is our wishes that construct our notion of “Canada,” so don’t ignore them. Your beliefs are the building blocks of the complete abstraction of the nation. So respect them, listen to them, and vote according to them.

I’m sitting in an airport right now. All around me ideologies are flowing into and around each other- the newspaper the guy next to me is reading, the broadcast on the TV in the bar across the terminal, the kid listening to his iPod, the girl hunched over her binder- every single one a different embodiment of a shared fantasy, every single one a different social entity with different priorities. You are one of this distinctive multitude. Tomorrow, when you’re in the voting booth, remember who you are, remember that you are as much a part of the political, social, ethical and philosophical discourse of Canadian identity as any official authority.

Please vote, please do so according to your convictions, regardless of what they may be.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Sorry!

I know!

I suck at being up-to-date! And there's so much to write about- Sarah Palin just got her passport last year and thinks people and dinosaurs used to be bros. The fact that I only have time to write about the symbolic representations of children in late 19th century Feminist fiction makes me more bummed out than you know. 

Please forgive/bear with me. I have a long weekend coming up, so I'll REALLY try to get something to you crazy kids by Tuesday.

Apologies all around! 

In the mean time, enjoy something else that I didn't do:




Meallat's YouTube Channel

Monday, September 29, 2008

Franchise

As I've mentioned before, I'm Canadian, and aggressively so. I believe that this country truly is wonderful and diverse and pluralistic, and doesn't just appear great on paper. As a nation, we posses an incredibly powerful creative impulse that manifests in world class music, art, literature and theatre. I try my absolute best to celebrate, defend and promote these creative pursuits. I listen to Canadian music, read Canadian plays and routinely tell people about how rad institutions like the CBC are. 

At the moment, however, I'm finding it increasingly difficult, as a fan and creator of the Canadian arts, to feel valid in my own nation. Our Prime Minister, Stephen Harper, has already slashed funding to arts programs across the nation, and is campaigning for re-election on the promise of more of the same. When asked how he could justify such a policy, he responded by saying that the arts in Canada were a "niche" interest, and that "ordinary" Canadians don't support arts funding. 

I call bullshit.

I am a student of the arts- I immerse myself in the culture that surrounds us, I analyze, interpret and represent my social world in my own creative efforts in music, writing and social performance. I will make my career in the creative and cultural industries. When I say that art is my life, it's not just a pithy cliche that teenagers use to seem educated. I mean it in a profoundly functional and utilitarian way. The arts ARE my life and will continue to be my life until the last nail has been put into my coffin. 

In these sentiments, I am not alone. My friends, teachers and family embody the creative impulse of Canadians. I know musicians, artists, writers, actors, directors, performance artists, dancers. Every one of them finds their identity and their functional goals in life through artistic endeavors. And rest-assured, they are all normal people. We are not the Gore Vidals or the David Sedarises. We are not the Kidmans or Cruises (thank Christ) or the LuPones. As Margaret Atwood as put it- Canadian artists, at the level I am speaking of, do not stand at gallery openings complaining about their grant money. We live and work at the level of every day interaction. I play music as a part of my day, my friend keeps a journal that she updates every night, her friend doodles in the margins of his notebooks during class and his mother creates elaborate needlepoints before she goes to bed at night. 

This is the Canadian creative class. These are ordinary Canadians, making manifest the creative impulse inherent to all humans in non-institutionalized ways. To cut arts funding based on an assertion that normal people do not care about creativity, and to segregate artistry into the realm of "casual hobby" or "meaningless pasttime" is to declare these creative individuals unfit for participation in the social discourse. By telling us that we are an anomaly, a "niche" or a statistical throw-away, Mr. Harper, you have labelled us as second-class citizens. 

All Canadians are creative. All Canadians are artists. By cutting funding to formal arts programs, you have permanently crippled those grass-roots community organizations which focus on the creative industries. In your mind, you have simply grounded the highest strata of professional artistry, knocking those snobbish, gallery-going creative types down a peg or two. In reality, however, you have disabled and hindered community organizations- small groups of weavers or knitters, volunteer-based community theatre programs, media literacy groups, accessible music education for youth. You have dismembered, based on the opinions of "ordinary" Canadians, the very bonds, institutions and shared experiences that bring together even the most "average" citizens. 

As Canadians, and as innately creative and artistic individuals, we deserve to be heard. We are not second-class citizens, we are not worthless simply because our paintings or songs or plays don't contribute in any appreciable way to the GDP. We are the ordinary, creative and artistic class at the core of Canadian pluralism and diversity. If we are made unimportant, it is only because of false labels, blind ignorance, and eyes shielded from the social worth of creative activity. 

Demand better! Demand to be taken seriously! You are a Canadian with the same rights and freedoms as any "ordinary" person. Recognize the value of your creative efforts and defend them to the ends of the Earth. 

The artists and the creative workers are always the first people silenced by fearful and weak governments. 

Speak up.